Waxing Poetic the Fourth, Poetry Month Day 3: Southern Heritage

Even though I am terrible at memorizing my own poems, I adore Slam Poets and Spoken Word Poetry. Def Poetry Jam is one of my all time favorite shows. How could you not love a show dedicated to the beautiful, funny, amazing poets they feature? As a matter of fact, I don't know how anyone could not love spoken word, but there are those that don't. Having semi-recently graduated from a creative writing program, I can tell you that there are those that not only don't like spoken word, they look down on it. They claim that "classic" poetry is more complex and better than spoken word. While I get that everyone has different tastes, but this is more than that. It's elitism, pure and simple. I love poetry in general, but I tend to identify more with poets who come from my sort of background and also those who come from other minorities and oppressed groups. Not to say that these people don't write "classic" poetry, but spoken word seems to provide more of a haven for us. There will likely be much much more spoke word in these poetry posts, so get ready. :-)

Jason Carney's "Southern Heritage" is a particular favorite of mine. He is brilliant, and I love all his work. But something about this one speaks to me specifically. Whether it's the Mawmaw or the Native heritage or the outrage, I don't know. I just know that I get chills every single time I listen to it.

Waxing Poetic the Third, Poetry Month Day 2: The Mustn'ts Can Stuff It

So, it's Poetry Month again, and as I am a poet...well, I write poetry. Calling myself a poet makes it seem a bit more solid of a vocation than it is right now. In any case, I write the stuff and love reading it as well. On terrible days, I can feel raw and exposed and pained, but then I read certain poets or poetry, and I'm good at least for a while.

In celebration of this awesomely nerdy month, I'm going to try to post an awesome poem of the day. Whether or not this happens is another story (note the italics and use of the word "try."As we can see, it's the 2nd, and this is just the 1st post...) To sum up: there will be poems, though how many is not for sure. Enjoy! And if you have an awesome suggestion for a poet or poem for me to check out, let me know please!

Today's selection is a short and simple one: my favorite Shel Silverstein poem. I've had it memorized since about age 6 and have threatened to get it tattooed somewhere on my person, although this has not yet happened.

Listen to the Mustn'ts

Listen to the MUSTN'TS, child,

Listen to the DON'TS.

Listen to the SHOULDN'TS,

the IMPOSSIBLES, the WON'TS.

Listen to the NEVER HAVES,

then listen close to me--

Anything can happen, child,

ANYTHING can be.

I still love this poem. While I have been told (both as a child and an adult) that it reinforces unrealistic beliefs in the "Dream It, Be It" philosophy, I choose to ignore that. Sometimes it's about wanting to grow up and be a cowgirl/astronaut/writer/teacher. Sometimes it's about grad school, but sometimes it's just about paying the rent when you are sure you will never have the cash by the 1st. Lately it has been more of the second and third. In either case, Shel has always been a comfort to me, and for that I will always be thankful to him.

Book Life 23: Reading Like a 5-Year-Old

For those of you who don't know, I have been employed at the Tallahassee Scholastic Book Fairs Warehouse since August. It isn't nearly as fun as it sounds, as I'm one of the grunts who fills and totes boxes all day in the cold/heat of the warehouse, but it is a rockin company to work for nonetheless. Not to mention, I end up feeling like I've done something decent at the end of the day. After all, I'm sending books to kids; can't be all bad, right? I mean, think about it...especially if you grew up in a rural area pre-internet (yep, old) like I did. Book Fair week was like fucking Christmas morning! Suddenly, where there had been only Wal-Mart to feed your book buying cravings, there were these shiny silver cases sitting in your school library! (And let me note that this was pre-Wal-Mart Supercenter. All we had was a very dinky regular WM with a very dinky book aisle. And yes, I practically lived at the city library, but there's something about owning your own books, you know?) Anyway, I digress...It was like Christmas and your birthday all rolled into one...well, it was for my geeky ass anyway. I never failed to get in trouble during book fair week. In junior high, they would let us go down to the library a couple at a time during English class to shop everyday. The teachers soon learned to make me wait before sending me, because I would spend the WHOLE class wandering down there. As a poor kid, I only had a very limited amount to spend, and by God, I was going to get the most out of every dollar. Screw those posters! Hand me Sweet Valley High, bitches!

With all that said, working at the warehouse has screwed with my reading list somewhat. Between the gift certificates we got during the winter sale and random things along the way, fully half of the 38 books I've read since January 1 have been classified as YA or children's literature--some old classics I'm rereading and some new and interesting discoveries. No, I have not quit reading "adult" literature (sounds like porn, huh?), but reading all this kids' lit has made me think about a few things. When we were little, there were a lot of people who viewed book fair day or library day as a revelation, as a beautiful, exciting thing, but as they get older, they lose the fascination they had so easily as a kid. Books lose that spark. Now, for me they never have. I can be just as excited wandering into a bookstore now as I did going to the book fair or library then, but I am a super book geek of the highest caliber. So I don't count. Take some of the people I work with for example. Scholastic implemented a "Stop, Drop, and Read!" initiative last season for all its branches. For 15 minutes a day, we stop
working and read. For me, this is fucking amazing! Pay me to sit and read? Yes, please! But for others there, it seems to be a chore...just one more thing that must be done before going home for the day. Some even seemed horrified by the idea, which I just don't get.I've noticed a couple of people, however, that have started reading during breaks or bring their own book now instead of just grabbing one of the ones from the warehouse since we've been doing this. It made me smile before, but now that I've been reading so much kids' lit, I think I understand it even better.

Reading children's literature is unlike reading any other genre. The stories are meant to be engaging at all times and to slip teaching moments in when possible, almost covertly. That way, kids are entertained and find themselves understanding new things without a lecture, and that makes a child feel amazing--to feel like they have figured something out without an adult leaning over their shoulder, regardless of what it is. I'm not saying these co-workers necessarily learned anything from reading the books at the warehouse, though I'm sure they did. What I am saying is that, just like I have been the past few weeks, they are being reminded of what it felt like to read as a kid, when every page felt like an actual door opening and we weren't so hard to impress. In turn, this is making them want to read more outside those 15 minutes.

I bitch and moan all the time about grown ups who claim to hate reading. I'm of the mind that no one can truly hate reading; it's just that they haven't found that one book that will just blow their minds. Maybe the problem isn't even that they haven't found the magic book. Maybe they just need to be handed a copy of Bridge to Terabithia or A Wrinkle in Time or Little House on the Prairie to remind them how awesome reading and books are. In short, they need to read like a 5-year-old. But you don't have to take my word for it...go find a kids' book you loved. Read it again, and I guarantee you, you'll see what I mean.

Book Life 21: In Which I Ramble About the Abortive Ending of the Vampire Chronicles

IMPORTANT NOTE: If you have not read the last two Chronicles books, and do not want anything at all spoiled, do not read this. I despise spoilers, and would not want to ruin the experience for you.

Over the past couple of weeks, I've been rereading the Vampire Chronicles in their entirety which I don't think I've done since the last one was published. Oh, I pick up Body Thief or Memnoch occasionally, but this time I started at Interview and just finished the last page of Blood Canticle. Up through Blood and Gold, which is (finally) the full tale of the life of Marius, I remembered how much I loved the Chronicles. I am a self-avowed fan of Lestat and most of the books Anne Rice has written. I've read all of them, Mayfair series, Violin, Servant of the Bones, the erotica, etc. Anyway, I've been pondering what went wrong with Blackwood Farm and Blood Canticle, because most assuredly, something did go wrong.

It isn't that the final two books aren't well written. I'm pretty sure it is impossible for Anne to write badly (although I haven't read and don't plan to read her newest ones so they could be terrible for all I know). However, something changed with Memnoch, and the series slowly drifted apart from there. If you haven't read it, Memnoch tells the tale of Lestat being courted by the Devil himself and taken through the "true" history of creation, God, etc. Being the religion geek that I am, I liked this book a great deal. I took issue with some of the plot twists at the end, but all in all, I enjoyed it. After this you have The Vampire Armand, Pandora, Vittorio, Merrick, and Blood and Gold. Armand is a whiner, but it was a good read. Pandora and Vittorio are largely outside the realm of the Chronicles (with the exception of Pandora's involvement with Marius), but excellent books. Vittorio is beautiful and strange enough that I forgive its digression. Merrick is the first book in which Anne tried to meld the Vampires and the Mayfairs, but it works in this one. Merrick is distant enough from the Mayfair series that you don't get bogged down, and frankly I just loved the Voodoo in the story. Blood and Gold is oddly framed, but being that it is Marius, it's fine. Then the train wreck happens. The thread of the main Chronicles story gets lost somewhere in Armand, and since the next few books are digressions, it just drifts away entirely until she attempts to find it again in Blackwood Farm and Blood Canticle.

*Sigh* The problem with the last two books is that they really don't want to be part of the Chronicles. Were it not for the fact that Lestat frames the first and narrates the second, they would have no ties whatsoever and could be continuations of the Mayfair Witches (especially Canticle). Here's the issue: Anne broke with the Catholic Church years and years ago, and sometime just before Memnoch she began to reconcile with them, which intensely colored her writing. She began to to think of the Chronicles as "darkness" and even titled her fairly recent memoir Called Out of Darkness. She started the fictional accounts of Jesus' life (which on the whole are not terrible--again, religion geek) at this point, and even appeared on that horrific show The 700 Club (see my response to that HERE). Even more recently she has broken with the Church again, but kept her Christianity. But now I'm digressing a bit. The point is that this all affected her books immensely. If Memnoch wasn't enough to prove it to you, Lestat's philosophizing throughout Canticle should do it.

I think Anne felt some modicum of responsibility to her long time loyal fans to finish the series rather than drop it at Marius' tale, but rather than take the time to properly end it as it warranted, she decided to rush the job. Blackwood Farm seems to travel on an odd and twisty path that makes little sense at times, though it is, of course, beautifully written as always. Toward the end, we get another main character shoehorned into our little universe, and at first, she seems okay--one of those characters you can stomach but don't really grow to love. The first time I read this (and this time, because I didn't remember what happened) all I could hope was that Mona would fade out of the picture early into Canticle, though I knew she'd appear because of the way Anne structured the end of Blackwood Farm, ending it in the middle of Lestat making her a fledgling. How sadly wrong I was. In all the Anne Rice novels EVER, there has never been a major character that I didn't grow to love in some way--until Mona Mayfair. She is the most horrendous little monster, and it gets to the point that every time she opens her mouth you think you can't dislike her more. Then she proves you wrong. She effectively ruins most of Canticle for me.

Now, I have heard (a few) dissenting opinions. There are those that actually like Mona, though how I will never know, and I'm sure those people think Anne did a wonderful job closing out the Chronicles. I am not among them. She dispatches Merrick Mayfair into the great beyond with so little fanfare that it's insulting (both to the character and her readers) in order to tie up a major plot line in Farm. I mean, really, how in the hell did she justify that mess to herself? Merrick was a powerful enough witch and Voodoo priestess that she could have sent Goblin's soul into the light without flinging herself into the flames as well. Hell, she was aiming to do just that in Merrick with the ghost of Claudia. Just ridiculous. Then Canticle, instead of truly focusing on Lestat, as the last of the series should have done in my opinion, she centers it on Mona's involvement with the Taltos (from the Mayfair Witches trilogy) and her unending ability to be one of the biggest bitches in christendom (oh, and Lestat's inexplicable obsession with Rowan Mayfair). Most of a few chapters in the middle are her being bitchy, Lestat getting angry at her, and Quinn being the go between. It was unbearably tedious. Frankly, he should have let her die on her bower of flowers in Quinn's bed at the end of Farm and saved us all the trouble.

In the final analysis, what I think happened is that Anne felt she needed to give her fans an ending to the Chronicles and (for some unknown reason) one to the Witches as well, so she threw them in her mental blender and voila! She used Farm to shove Mona into the picture, giving the Mayfairs a reasonable claim on story space, and then she used Canticle to play out the end of the Taltos saga. I might not be so aggravated by all this if she didn't attempt to call them both Chronicle books. Had she simply been honest and presented them as a bizarre (and wholly unnecessary) extension of the Mayfairs, I would at least have known what I was walking into: A hot mess, but at least a properly categorized one.

Panic and Doom/Book Life 13: In Which the Recent Graduate Comes to Terms with Said Graduation and Buries Her Panic in Books

Well, here we are: the very first post-graduation blog post. As of about 10 pm Friday the 29th, I became an alumna of Florida State with a BA in Religion, minor in Women's Studies; a BA with honors in Women's Studies, minor in Religion; and a BA in Creative Writing, minor in Latin. Since then, I have had about 3 panic attacks and at least one minor breakdown. Yes, I'm happy and proud of myself; after all, this is something I've been looking forward to for quite some time now. The entire seven years I was out of school, all I could think of was getting back in and finishing what I started, and I finally did--three times over. But now, without homework and classes, I am utterly lost. When I graduated high school, I knew I was headed off to college, so everything was cool. Now, I have no plan. With the Religion department rejecting me yet again, I have been left to wander about in my own ruminations, and as anyone who knows me well will tell you, my ruminations are no place to wander aimlessly.

Thus, I have spent the last week or so since the official "hell no" from the department showed up in my mailbox going over and over my choices. First of all, I HAVE to get a job, which is much easier said than done in this town, open availability or not. Anna needs a break, and we need to pay bills. Second, I have to figure out what happens next. There is a short list of schools that I would love to attend for my MA/PhD, and there's also Teach for America, which embodies many of my most deeply held ideals about changing the world. Of course, any of those choices hinge on my acceptance to said program, none of which are simple to get into, and who wants to give me enough of a financial package. Right now, though, I just need a paycheck.

Okay, enough of my panicked existential angst about the future...since I am no longer writing papers and studying for tests, I once again have time to read whatever the hell I want for the first time in ages. :-)

Pastwatch: The Redemption of Christopher Columbus by Orson Scott Card

"Who cares if a mathematician calls us dirty names like 'unreal'? They say such slanders about the square root of minus two as well."--Diko, in Pastwatch

I first read this book several years ago and fell in love with it. Normally, I am not that much of an Orson Scott Card fan--not that he isn't great, but just not one of my favorites. This particular book, however, is neither part of any of his series nor like any of his other writings as far as I can tell. Written from a far future vantage point, the human race has just been through a century of warfare, famine, and other horrors and is now living in a time of peace and plenty. They've developed what is called Pastwatch, which has built machines capable of looking at the past. As it progresses, they figure out that they are actually capable of changing the past as well, and one scholar discovers that Christopher Columbus may very well be the point at which all future conquest and evil began. I won't go on, because, you know, spoilers, but rest assured it is worth the read. Even if sci-fi isn't usually your thing, Pastwatch should be on your to-read list, if for no other reason than Card has discovered the most seamless way of working historical research into fiction than I've seen in a long time.

I'm Having an Affair with an Adverb: Waxing Poetic, the First

It's no secret that I love poetry; I've written it (and everything else I can manage) for as long as I can remember. Being in poetry workshops has only made this love an obsession. Everything I think tries to come out in lines, in fact. Anyway, the point is that I tend to fall desperately in love with words and poems and lines and, well, I get somewhat carried away at times. The following is one poem I've become engrossed in. The bolded lines I'm in love with...

* * * * * * * *

Monet Refuses the Operation by Lisel Mueller

Doctor, you say that there are no haloes
around the streetlights in Paris
and what I see is an aberration
caused by old age, an affliction.
I tell you it has taken me all my life
to arrive at the vision of gas lamps as angels,
to soften and blur and finally banish
the edges you regret I don't see,
to learn that the line I called the horizon
does not exist and sky and water,
so long apart, are the same state of being.
Fifty-four years before I could see
Rouen cathedral is built
of parallel shafts of sun,
and now you want to restore
my youthful errors: fixed
notions of top and bottom,
the illusion of three-dimensional space,
wisteria separate
from the bridge it covers.
What can I say to convince you
the Houses of Parliament dissolve
night after night to become
the fluid dream of the Thames?
I will not return to a universe
of objects that don't know each other,
as if islands were not the lost children
of one great continent. The world
is flux, and light becomes what it touches,
becomes water, lilies on water,
above and below water,
becomes lilac and mauve and yellow
and white and cerulean lamps,
small fists passing sunlight
so quickly to one another
that it would take long, streaming hair
inside my brush to catch it.
To paint the speed of light!
Our weighted shapes, these verticals,
burn to mix with air
and changes our bones, skin, clothes
to gases. Doctor,
if only you could see
how heaven pulls earth into its arms
and how infinitely the heart expands
to claim this world, blue vapor without end.

Lucretia: Behind the Myth

Anyone who knows me well, knows I hate the story of Lucretia from Roman history. I had to read it for Women's Studies and in all 3 semesters of Latin so far, and I. Hate. It. It should NOT end with her committing suicide. She should have taken someone's sword and gone Xena on Sextus Tarquinius herself. There shouldn't have been anything left to banish. Had she been put to death for that act, I could stomach her fall, but the suicide to prevent shame? Please....

Anyway, I had to "interview" a mythological or historical figure for my article/essay class this weekend, and the following is what happened. It may not be the best thing I've ever come up with, but it also had to be 500 words, which I went over by 43...so, cut me a bit of slack...

Lucretia: Behind the Myth

Lucretia: a name, that for students of Women’s Studies and the Classics, brings up many emotions. For some, it is pity for her tragic end; for others, anger, at the way she was used in Roman literature. In either case, it is clear that Lucretia has a lasting place in academia and in history, but how much of the truth are we really getting from Livy? Hopefully, we will discover the answer today, as I had the fortune of interviewing Lucretia herself on the events that made her famous and the legacy they created.

D: For those unfamiliar with your story, would you mind giving a brief summary?

L: Not at all. Collatinus, my husband, was away at the siege of Ardea, and apparently they found time to have a party in the royal barracks. He and his cousins began boasting about how virtuous their wives were, and (egged on by too much wine, I’m sure) decided to test us. So they rode to Rome where all the royal daughters-in-law were at a banquet, quite enjoying themselves while the husbands were away on the battlefield. Hoping to find me in a similar situation, they rode to Collatia. Much to my husband’s delight (and his cousins’ dismay), they found me sitting with my maidservants wool-working. This pissed Sextus, the king’s son, off, and after all had returned to battle, he came to my house. As he is related, he was granted entry, and breaking into my bedchamber, he raped me. Long story short, the Tarquins were expelled, ending the kingship, and the Republic began.

D: Now, Livy states that you called Collatinus and your father the next day, and after you told them what happened, you committed suicide. There is some question of whether this is actually what happened. Some say your father killed you because of the shame. What really happened?

L: (sighs) That is the main reason I agreed to this interview. I am tired of being used as the poster girl for “Roman womanhood.” Yes, Sextus raped me. Yes, I told my husband and father who vowed to avenge me. Yes, it caused the downfall of the kingship and the beginning of the Republic. But, no, I was not killed by either my hand or the hand of my father.

D: But Livy?

L: Livy was a historian, but he liked to embellish a bit. Particularly in my case. Why should I have committed suicide? I had done nothing wrong! Sextus was a vile pig of a man who forced me at sword-point. Yes, I felt betrayed and violated, but I was mostly angry. How dare this man, kin of my husband, abuse his relationship so, and all because his own wife was being silly and frivolous at a banquet!

D: So, all this time, Women’s Studies students have been getting incensed for no reason?

L: Well, no…I mean, yes, but for the wrong reasons. The anger was at my feeling that I needed to kill myself to avoid the shame of being a “sullied woman,” when really it should have been at the establishment that felt it necessary to write the story that way. And from what I gather from your media, it hasn’t changed much…

Book Life 12: Geeky Revisited, Awe, and We Was Po': Another Voice

Once again, it's that magical time of year--those few weeks when, even though one semester has ended and another has yet to begin, there is wonder in the air. What? No, not the holiday season. I mean that small span of time in which there is no homework and I can read whatever I want! I've already gone through 7 books with way too many more waiting in line. Hence, time for another book life blog!

"Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so." -Douglas Adams

Even though I've read them before (many times before, as a matter of fact), the five books comprising the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy trilogy never fail to amaze me. (And yes, for those of you unfortunate enough not to have read these novels, I did say five books and trilogy.) Funny as hell and just plain well-written. If you've never read them, please do. You will thank me later, and remember "Deep in the fundamental heart of mind and Universe, "said Slartibartfast, "there is a reason."

Just plain beautiful.

I have never met a Sherman Alexie book I did not love and whose children I did not want to bear. War Dances is no different. Gorgeous poetry and awesome stories. That is all.

Down Home Economics

The last book in this post is Deer Hunting with Jesus: Dispatches from America's Class War. Essentially the author, Joe Bageant, moves back home to his small Virginia hometown after about 20 or so years and explores the lower working class culture in which he grew up. While I wasn't thrilled with the underlying tone he took when talking about his brethren at a few points, it was overall a really good discussion of issues not usually covered. The rural poor are generally ignored in favor of highlighting the urban poor. This is not to say that either is more important or poor than the other; both situations have their own peculiar obstacles to overcome. It's just that in academic and political discussions of poverty, the plight of the rural poor is generally overlooked or assumed to be covered under the umbrella of "poverty" which is really just urban. I'm not entirely sure that I agree with some of his views about gun control and a few minor details, but as a whole, this is an excellent book--particularly for those of us from this sort of background lost on planets not of our making. For my fellow religion geeks, he does a fairly good job of incorporating fundamentalism into his observations. And the chapter on the Social Security system, healthcare, and the poor elderly is amazing.

"He would say that my soul is troubling me and that I need to be washed in the blood and redeemed by the grace of him who bled for our sins. I'd say that I am troubled by the distinct impression of approaching trihorned fascism--part Christian, part military, part corporate."--J. Bageant

Book Life 10: Following the Dead...Presidents, That Is...and How to Blow Up the World

Assassination Vacation by Sarah Vowell

This is one of those books that has been on my "to read" list since it first came out--around 2005. At one point, I think we had it out of the library; Anna read it, but I was managing that god forsaken store in Talladega at the time, so....Anyway, Vowell covers the Lincoln, Garfield, and McKinley assassinations in an amazingly funny way. Along the way, you learn all kinds of strange information while also following her on her road trips to the historical sites associated with each of the deaths. I don't particularly know what to say about this one except that it was an excellent and quick read, and her other books are on my "to read" list for the next break. Fun Fact: Sarah Vowell was the voice of Violet, the daughter, in the Pixar movie, The Incredibles.

E=mc^2: A Biography of the World's Most Famous Equation by David Bodanis

When I told my friend Sam that this was a great book, he gave me "the look". You know, the "I'm sure it's great but wow what a geek are you" look lol. While I do read quite a lot of material on astrophysics, etc. that can be, frankly, over my head in places, this isn't one of them. Bodanis wrote this book as a way of explaining Einstein's equation to people who may or may not be familiar with physics, without sounding like he's trying to talk down to you. I loved it. He takes the equation apart and gives the history of each component, which was awesome, because though I kind of get what the whole equation does, I never knew the background of the pieces. For instance, I never knew that there were two women so influential in discovering and researching ideas that made the theory of relativity possible. I also never knew that Heisenberg, of the famous Uncertainty Principle, was basically a flaming Nazi; he was in charge of the Third Reich's atomic bomb program. And I don't mean he worked for them under duress and had serious issue with their actions; he once told a colleague that he knew about the concentration camps, but what can you do, you need the labor. o.0 All in all, of any of this interests you, pick up this book, regardless of whether you are a physics nerd. The chapter explaining how the atomic bomb actually works is worth it on its own.

Book Life 9: Beam Me Up (Yet Again)

Star Trek: Myriad Universes: Infinity's Prism by William Leisner, Christopher L. Bennett, and James Swallow

Ahhh...the all-too-short break between spring and summer semesters is here. You know what that means? OUTSIDE READING! YAY! Don't get me wrong; there are only a few books that I have had in classes that I didn't like. However, sometimes the lovelies lying unread on my shelf call my name, and during the semester, I must ignore them. This particular book has been being ignored since the last break unfortunately...

In any case, if you are a Star Trek geek and are unfamiliar with the Myriad Universes series by Pocket Books, you need to go get them now! Basically each volume (there are 2 already in print with another on the way in December of this year) is three short ST novels, each written with the idea that at least one thing in the standard ST universe did not go as we know it. Hence the name Myriad Universes. I've read both of the ones that are out, and I LOVE THEM. This one in particular is interesting because of the final novel, though the first two are awesome as well.

Seeds of Dissent by James Swallow incorporates not only the characters of ST Voyager but also Capt. Picard (in a tangential way). The historical difference here is that rather than be defeated Khan won in the early twentieth century and his empire in the twenty-third extends beyond Earth to the Trill home world as well as Vulcan and a host of others. What Swallow has done is create a ST version of the classic "if Hitler had won" idea, and it works quite well. The most interesting is the notion of rewritten history. Almost no one in the 23rd century knows that Khan was a bloodthirsty tyrant; the histories available paint him as a savior. It is definitely enough to make one consider the history one was fed in school (if that hasn't already happened)...

because i obviously don't have enough distractions....

it has come to my attention that, contrary to my own beliefs, i am the biggest procrstinator in the Western Hemisphere...since my first semester back had me finishing everything early, i can only imagine that it has developed slowly over the last two years rather than simply being a dormant condition of which i was unaware. that being said, there are several websites that have been contributing much to the sad procrastination that is enveloping me...

So here they are, my favorite time-wasters:

1. Facebook...obvious time-waster...iphone app and online
2. Twitter...not alone here, I know...iphone app and online
3. 11 points...awesome site I just discovered that is exactly what it sounds like...top 11 lists...because "top ten lists are for cowards" lol
4. Texts from Last Night...again, an obvious site...posts of texts and text conversations...and lemme tell you, when you search by area code for your own, you can get awfully frightened by what you find
5. Overheard in New York...random things, wait for it, overheard in New York City
6. I Can Has Cheezburger...this is made much worse by the iphone app...lolcats, dogs, and ppl at my fingertips 24-hours-a-day?! hell yeah
7. Epicute...cute and interesting things with food...the lolcats of the culinary world...
8. Cute Overload...way too cute animals
9. FML...code for fuck my life...massive amounts of posting of people probably having a worse day than you...

3 oh 3 is a magic number...and i'll leav it at that

book life 8: the beginning of a plan...

I am straight-up jacking this idea from editorial ass ( Project Fill-in-the-Gaps)...there are so many books that I want to read, and if I don't set myself on some sort of schedule, I never will. the list is forthcoming...translation: I haven't started it yet. I will though. Swear.

Book Life 7: Beam Me Up, Chocolate, Armageddon, and OCD in Paris

I won’t say a lot about these books--just random observations mostly--but they were all fabulous.

Mr. Monk is Miserable by Lee Goldberg

It should come as no surprise that I love Monk--both the show and the books. The producers do a better-than-average job portraying his ocd and how it can affect his life. There have been bad guys that got away (at least initially) because of various obsessive compulsive intrusions, for example. I would recommend these books to anyone who loves monk or mysteries--awesome on both counts. This one has Monk and Natalie in Paris and has some awesome tangents into the city's sights and subcultures.

Star Trek: The Next Generation Resistance by J.M. Dillard

Trekkie alert (and no I do not think that Trekker is a better name, nor do I think Trekkie is derogatory): ) I love all Star Trek books, fiction or not. I have a greater affinity for TNG-based (The Next Generation, for those out of the loop) plots, but all are welcome on my shelves. I also have a thing for Borg plotlines, which this one happened to have. All the Trekkies/Trekkers know that Capt. Picard was briefly assimilated at some point, and this book uses that extensively. Great read, but then aren’t they all?

Star Trek Destiny: Book I, Gods of Night by David Mack

For those who don’t like books that jump back and forth from plot to plot, this isn’t for you. Not only does this one jump from plot to plot (though they are ultimately all linked), it jumps back and forth hundreds of years in time. I happen to have no problem with these plot devices and loved this book. The Federation is in the midst of a Borg War (in Picard’s time), and an interesting parallel story develops through the past into Picard and Riker’s time. There is also an upsetting development with Riker and Troi (who are now on the Titan). My main HUGE problem with this book is that it’s part of a trilogy, and I couldn’t afford to buy all three when I bought this one. It ends pretty bluntly, so if you pick this book up, buy the other 2 at the same time if you can. Otherwise, you are gonna be pissed on that last page. (Book 2-Mere Mortals, Book 3-Lost Souls).

I’m Perfect, You’re Doomed: Tales from a Jehovah’s Witness Upbringing by Kyria Abrahams

Given that I am spending half of my time in college studying it, it isn’t a shocker that I’m interested in religion. I’ll read memoirs all day long, especially if they’re no longer part of the religion. But I was particularly interested in this one because my wife’s family is Jehovah’s Witness. I have been to a Kingdom Hall, people, and I tell you now that it is effin WEIRD. Anna verified many of the stranger tidbits in the book, and I still have trouble believing some of it. It is all very true, however unfortunate that may be. A great aside in the narrative was Kyria’s ocd. I really wish she would have gone further into it and maybe explored the link between her religion and the ocd, but still, interesting.

Candyfreak: A Journey Through the Chocolate Underbelly of America by Steve Almond

Unlike most of the food books I read, this one didn't make me afraid to eat things. Almond is a self-professed candyfreak who travels the country in search of the history of some of his and America's favorite candies. I have never heard of a lot of them, as candy is stilll a much more regional thing than I thought. He also discusses how the big conglomerate candy companies are running the mom-and-pop operations out of business or at least absorbing them. Fabulous read, especially if you are as obsessed with food and food history as I am.

just a note

so, i got these grants--one for books from the honors office and one from the undergraduate research office, and i had to go to a luncheon for the recipients on tuesday. dr. erndl went with me, and it honestly wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. i was, not surprisingly, the freak in the room...these were all people that i more than likely would never hang out with...but it was nice on one count.

dr. erndl and i were talking to mrs. dummer from the honors office about how undergraduate research is undervalued and not really supported for the most part. it was cool to be in a room of people that understood the simple need to find out why and supported it.

oh the geekiness knows no bounds

So, I'm starting my honors thesis soon, and I had to get a thesis director. And I am very excited that one of the most awesome professors on the planet agreed to be my director--Dr. Erndl! Not only that, Dr. Gray, the equally awesome, whom I thought would not be back from her fulbright teaching in morocco by next fall, actually said she WANTS to be on my defense committee! I hugged the woman for that one...I had a really good school day, y'all!!!

and it occurs to me that the level of one's geekitude (and yes that is a word...at least now it is) can be measured by the people on whom and the reasons for one's little crushes...i have such the academic girly-crushes on drs. gray and erndl...it is sad, I must say...so, anyway, i figure that makes me Queen Geek, Her Majesty of Nerd Land...